Weekend Roundup, Extreme Vomit Edition

by Lackner, 08/07/2008

Warning: I am about to ruin your lunch, and perhaps your whole life, but try to persist because open bar awaits you.

Well, I guess Last Night's Party has jumped the shark. There was a time a year or so ago that you'd check out the site and marvel that women of a certain caliber, ditsy, statuesque model chicks, would willingly kneel, naked but for their Christian Louboutins, on a piss-soaked bathroom floor and diddle themselves with a Dum Dum lollipop. Voodoo, witchcraft, liquor; who knows what made it happen?

I guess Bronques has run out of those girls. Unless Bronques is trying to join a fraternity by hogging I don't know how I can ever look forward to his photo sets again. Who knows when a porkchop will pop up, ruining the tumescence I worked so hard to develop. I wonder if, while that picture was being taken, there was a piercing "Boop boop boop" in the air, like when a garbage truck backs up.

If you still have the energy to continue living, read on for our suggestions for this weekend.

Friday:

Fracture at White Room: Featuring an unheard of open bar from 12-1am and 15 minutes at the bottom of every hour afterward. Read that again and then apologize for shitting yourself. Music by Johnny Strokes, Diego, Dalton. White Room is located at 1306 North Miami Ave in Downtown Miami.

Saturday:

{{photo:20870}}

Deadmau5 at Mansion: The tech-electro-house ghod is back at it at again. Armed to the gills with MIDI controllers and Ableton, his last show was incredible and he was able to illicit a response from the crowd that I did not think typical of Fridays at Mansion. Mansion is located at 1235 Washington Ave.

New Times' Unzipped Fashion Show at Midtown 4: Free dranks, DJ Black Jesus, and fashion. Presented by our friends at Live Life and the Miami New Times (hi Duran!). Clothing by Jolie, Kristina Ashley, Le Jealous and Kore. Midtown 4 is located at 3301 NE 1st Ave in the new Midtown development.

Monday:

Scottie B at Exposure (White Room): Pioneer of the "Baltimore sound," DJ Scottie B, appears for a rare Miami show. If you like your music super amped and baaaaaanngin, and can think of a good excuse for work on Tuesday, this is the place to be. We are giving away a free bottle as well, to make it more interesting.

Photo
Comments disabled Tags: Weekend Roundup
There are 9 comments about this post:
comment #0, posted by BurnDown at 08/07/2008 2:06pm Reply
Last Night's Party:

"Stay Classy, kids."
The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt.
comment #1, posted by Chuck at 08/07/2008 3:54pm Reply
Been waiting for the deadmau5 show for a while. Can't wait!
comment #2, posted by B.A.C. at 08/07/2008 4:22pm Reply
He killed it last time he was in town Chuck. He is a must see.
I am the eggman
comment #3, posted by Chuck at 08/07/2008 4:48pm Reply
Yeah I heard, but sadly missed out. Saw him at Ultra in full mau5 gear and it was sick.
comment #4, posted by Chuck at 08/07/2008 4:48pm Reply
About this photo >> He's a Blue Mau5 now.
comment #5, posted by the talking pod at 08/07/2008 6:41pm Reply
Doesn't he have little LNP-slaves running around doing his bidding? Maybe a slave shot the hog.
comment #6, posted by the talking pod at 08/07/2008 6:42pm Reply
Oh, and if you're of a mind, LA's Trent Cantrelle is at Gryphon. We're offering free entry since he asked us to.

http://guide.talknightlife.com/guestlists/register/2804

It's a haul, but worth it.
comment #7, posted by J*SANCHEZ at 08/08/2008 1:39pm Reply
porkchop... LOLZ!!!
gimme a beat!
comment #8, posted by CarStar* at 08/09/2008 12:38pm Reply
jesus look at that back fat! who took this picture and why?! and for the record i think garbage trucks make a "beep beep" sound.
xo
CarStar*

Check out our new Facebook page maker.