Hot chicks with no money rejoice!

by CarStar*, 05/15/2008

I was having a serious talk with one of my best friends last Friday night (Michelle, holla!) about what it truly is to be a real Miami girl. We live what Miller Beer likes to call "the High Life" and we do it at a Miller price -- cheap. Now don't get me wrong, my purse is a real Coach and my shoes are all Steve Madden, but after the new $200 dollar dress from BCBG and my mani-pedi in Pinecrest the pocket book is a bit empty. But what can I do about it? Not looking fabulous is not an option, so I've learned a few tricks of the Miami Trade that I'd like to share with you.

Miami Girls have it all, and at a price no one can turn down: FREE. If you know how to be social, make new friends every night! You'll be surprised where they lead you, and be a good friend, so when the time comes that your low on drink and low on funds that guy you joked with while waiting in line for the bathroom (and ladies, be aware that a Miami girl does not wait in line unless its for the bathroom, and don't try to skip cause thats how things end up in the ER) he'll offer you a drink, and you'll be happy with a new friend and drink, and he'll be happy thinking you might get drunk enough to make-out with him (lets try to control ourselves please, real Miami girls need to be picky not sloppy). 

Miami girls it's time to put on your heels and leave your Coach wallets at home, because I'm taking you out! (but don't forget your ID's)

Miami Girl Classic Happy Hour:

Every third Thursday of the month the Miami Art Museum holds Jam at the MAM. It's a happy hour between 5 - 8:30 p.m. at the museum with FREE drinks and FREE ors d'oeuvres It's basically the best place for first dates and pre-drinking before the big night, and you get a chance to view the month's new featured artist. If you don't want to bring a date, this is the perfect place to find a more well rounded guy with taste.

How About Dinner and Night Life:

So you've got a good buzz on, your dressed up and ready to hit the town, but it's only 8:30 p.m. (and your walking out of MAM). No worries we'll do dinner. Hop back on the Metro and get off at the Grove (if it's just you and the girls get a cab, or a D.D.). Two very good friends of mine (O and G, holla!) are offering you dinner on them at Nikki Beach Grove. Between 8 - 10 p.m. Nikki Beach Grove has a dinner special for ladies -- you guessed it -- FREE and a complimentary glass of wine or champagne. The menu changes every week, so it's fun to come back. Dinner reservations are limited so call NOW Contact Greg Trujillo at 305-401-4644 (tell him CarStar* sent you).

Now your drunk, tummy is happy, where to go? Hold it! You're already there. After the dinner rush, all the tables are moved and Nikki Grove turns into a night club. If you go on the right Thursday night you'll get to party it up with Miami's #1 DJ Danny Daze and the other nights seem to live up to the craze (though I'm a D.Daze fan now and forever).

So it's 3 a.m., you've seen art, gotten drunk, sobered up with a good meal, than got drunk again and made out with some guy that says he went to high school with you (thank god he's cute now) and you didn't even have to use your emergency credit card. All in all a fabulous Thursday Night.

Bill me later.

Photo
Comments disabled Tags: Art, Cautionary Tale, Coconut Grove, Downtown Miami, Nightclubs: Nikki Coconut Grove
There are 33 comments about this post:
comment #0, posted by arielle c. at 05/15/2008 3:14pm Reply
JAM at MAM is $10 to get in if you're not a member of the museum. still agood deal though, and at least some money goes to some culture.
comment #1, posted by Nicky Pooh Poo at 05/15/2008 3:45pm Reply
I've been a long time reader of this site, having admired Lackner and Duran's creative and hysterical writing style and from time to time B.A.C. as well. But honestly, Coach? Is that something to be proud of? Steve Madden? Mami, Step up your game. And if you must wear such disgustingly chonga brands please be kind enough to spare us the grimey details. It’ll do your Coach (just puked a bit) pocket book just as well to shop at Last Call and Off of Saks. Dios mio, Mija. If you absolutely must then at least have the common decency to hit up your local Forever 21 branch. Don’t worry girlie I will light a candle for you.

P.S. I wouldn’t normally fly off the handle but having considered contributing to Miami Nights several times, only to not have enough time to do so, I and probably most reader would appreciate it if you didn’t compromise the integrity of the site with your Nooooo que barato style writing.

Regards,
N
comment #2, posted by Lackner at 05/15/2008 3:47pm Reply
Thanks for the feedback Nicky!
pop lock and drop it
comment #3, posted by B.A.C. at 05/15/2008 4:22pm Reply
Only from From time to time?!?!!? argh!
I am the eggman
comment #4, posted by SouthPointE at 05/15/2008 5:12pm Reply
U just summed up most miami chicks.=)
"The ugliest of truths is prettier than
the most beautiful lie"
comment #5, posted by JC at 05/15/2008 5:33pm Reply
Vapid, vapid, Miami chicks. Its true you and your homie Michelle(holler!) could compare chicks here with that of a watered down cheap tasteless beer that goes down well with jaeger... ($5 happy meal style- purdy lounge- holler!)
Ironically a song by Amy Winehouse was playing when I read this post... "Fuck me Pumps" I lol'd. . .

P.s.- I'm so glad you reassured us that your purse AND wallet are *real* coach and shoes are alllll nothing but what else, steve madden! Not to mention you spent 200 on a BCBG dress!!! (off the rack even, I didnt know they sold that in the states?!)... don't forget you got your manipedi in the pines(holler4Lyf!). I was almost not going to accept you until you made it absolutely clear how you classy like you roll- fake frontin with big empty cuchi purses. Barterwhore 4Lyf!! Being a mooch is cool. Not being able to afford your own drinks or dinner is cool. Having a gaudy ass unoriginal coach purse is cool. Chongas are super tremendo cool. Douchebags are cool but promoters are cooler- Free bartons vodka!! But of course, shitting on miaminights blog with all your douchinessis the most rad of all.

comment #6, posted by SouthPointE at 05/15/2008 5:40pm Reply
OUCH!!
"The ugliest of truths is prettier than
the most beautiful lie"
comment #7, posted by Rikki Z at 05/15/2008 6:52pm Reply
ZING!
i can haz digits plox?
comment #8, posted by Mr. S! at 05/15/2008 9:13pm Reply
No need to attack the poor girl anymore. Sorry carstar*, wrong website for you. Your writing isn't bad, but not for miaminights audience. You should get a second chance though!!! We all fuck up from time to time! Just don't admit your one of those girls that most REAL people loathe.
comment #9, posted by mia promoter at 05/15/2008 9:24pm Reply
Hey Mami Im a promoter. Im wearing steve maddens.. wanna mooch off my bottle and give me some brain??

Holla4sho!
comment #10, posted by miamibrave at 05/15/2008 11:21pm Reply
im guessing you were transplanted from the midwest...think you're big time now livin the crazy life in miami. i cant think of any other reason you would brag about coach steve madden and bcbg. i guess your shallowness would have been easier to swallow if you were bragging on your LV, JC, and RC. i still wouldn't like you but then i would better understand why you were broke and moochin. if coach madden and bcbg break your bank then maybe miami isnt for you. your average hipster is wearing $200 jeans $150 shoes countless accesories AND they dont mention the price.
welcome to the miami scene.
comment #11, posted by J*SANCHEZ at 05/16/2008 08:01am Reply
There are no words.
gimme a beat!
comment #12, posted by keyrat at 05/16/2008 09:03am Reply
Well, it worked. 12 comments.
"Ahh, she's built like a steakhouse, but she handles like a bistro."
comment #13, posted by Kathleen at 05/16/2008 09:06am Reply
You might want to go back to freshman year English class and refresh your grammar skills a bit before posting an article on a website. There's a difference between your and you're, which you repeatedly disregard.
comment #14, posted by unbiased at 05/16/2008 09:47am Reply
1) good post miamibrave, it costs a lot of money to look broke.

2) can anyone report on the whereabouts of carstar* following this massacre? She's probably in the hospital, acute cosmopolitan poisoning.
you are electric?
comment #15, posted by CarStar* at 05/16/2008 10:44am Reply
lmao unbaised! i just woke up and read all of these at once! amazing what happens when you try to show everyone a good time that doesn't involve a crack rock and house music. yeaa so I'm preppy and I like it when things are free for me, but who doesn't?
But I'm glad it got everyone so fired up...
xo
CarStar*
comment #16, posted by SouthPointE at 05/16/2008 11:05am Reply
Youre a good Trooper=)
"The ugliest of truths is prettier than
the most beautiful lie"
comment #17, posted by chipi at 05/16/2008 11:21am (reply to comment #15 by CarStar*) Reply
lmao unbaised! i just woke up and read all of these at once! amazing what happens when you try to show everyone a good time that doesn't involve a crack rock and house music. yeaa so I'm preppy and I like it when things are free for me, but who doesn't?
But I'm glad it got everyone so fired up...


fo real girl. way to take it like a champ lol
kisskiss bangbang.
comment #18, posted by tati at 05/16/2008 12:12pm Reply
there is nothing wrong with a good night out with your friends that just so happens to be free... lets face it, all true miami girls have their own weekly ladies night schedule. so the drinks are not top shelf, big deal. now we have more cash to buy a new dress for tomorrow night. yey. i luv miami
comment #19, posted by JC at 05/16/2008 12:51pm (reply to comment #15 by CarStar*) Reply

No Crackrock no house no problem!

Try cocaine and electro.....



comment #20, posted by funk44 at 05/16/2008 4:14pm Reply
CarStar...i agree with some on here that this blog should have been written a little better, but your intentions are in the right place. The only problem I have ever had with this site is that it mostly caters to the scene kids....And by scene kids I am describing most of the people leaving comments, who probably happen to be broke kids who believe themselves to be popular in their own world yet probably have a very unsuccessful life(some of your parents dont even like you. That will mean something to most of you eventually). Scene kids who cant afford nice venues, so they have to belittle them because the only spot they can afford a drink at is a SHITHOLE. (I know that places are overpriced, but I see it as them weeding out the thugs and douchebag emo kids for me)
As a reader, I respect Lackner's and Bryan's writings, but the rest of these would be journalists are a fucking joke.
Lackner keep hiring new bloggers and eventually you will find writers worth our time. Please dont just hire emo kids. I cant stand the "im so original, yet you all fucking look the same" look. (excuse me while I go vomit)

Carstar please continue to blog, but just do it to the best of your abilities to prove these criticizing assholes wrong....(i love people who cant give constructive criticism, obviously)

Best of Luck
comment #21, posted by Duran at 05/16/2008 4:28pm Reply
As a reader, I respect Lackner's and Bryan's writings, but the rest of these would be journalists are a fucking joke.
Lackner keep hiring new bloggers and eventually you will find writers worth our time. Please dont just hire emo kids. I cant stand the "im so original, yet you all fucking look the same" look. (excuse me while I go vomit)

Wow I write the bulk of the load and no shout out from the angry tirade courtesy of funk44 :(
Ghost of Miami Nights Past
comment #22, posted by funk44 at 05/16/2008 4:49pm Reply
actually Duran...i read you writing and enjoy it most of the time......BUT other times I feel as if you are overly starstruck by some of the people you meet.... I realize this is a blog and you can choose to write in whatever fashion you choose, but it comes across as if you arent used to landing decent interviews and meeting pseudo famous people......Best way to describe it, you sound like a 24 yr old who just lost his virginity and calls his best friend and says "OH GOD, Guess what i Just did?"...friend who lost his virginity already(your readers) think "welcome to the club finally, now act like youve been here before"

Just messing with you brother....i liked that you kept people udated during WMC

BTW did CarStar quit yet? you guys crucified her...i was reading the comments and figured she might turn emo(the worst of all fates)...lol
comment #23, posted by Duran at 05/16/2008 4:55pm Reply
pseudo famous people are the only people that impress me. trust me, doing those WMC posts was the worse thing i ever had to do in my life. i wanted to slit my wrists by day 3.
Ghost of Miami Nights Past
comment #24, posted by CarStar* at 05/16/2008 5:09pm (reply to comment #22 by funk44) Reply
Im HERE and thanks for the advice, I haven't quit but your right about me working on my skill. And no worries emo kids don't scare me-i used to work for Studio A. ha
thanks again funk44 maybe one day together we will change the world lol.
and duran-xo


xo
CarStar*
comment #25, posted by Lackner at 05/16/2008 5:11pm Reply
If I ever see CarStar I am going to give her a big ole hug, but carefully cuz I don't want to mess up her hair
pop lock and drop it
comment #26, posted by CarStar* at 05/16/2008 5:18pm Reply
oh Lackner, if you try your best to remember Im the girl at your anniversary party who was trying to convince you to pop a bottle! We used to cross paths quite a bit back in the pawn shop days. Good times. And thanks for looking out for my hair.
xo
CarStar*
comment #27, posted by Lackner at 05/16/2008 5:38pm Reply
Oh no
pop lock and drop it
comment #28, posted by Saraht. at 05/16/2008 7:55pm (reply to comment #22 by funk44) Reply
Duran and all the MN fellas and fellets are seriously talented- MUCH Respect!

Aren't we a bunch of judging son-of-a-fucks.
I smell a return of that one blog (from last summer.. name(?) that trashed everyone and it caught on and spread onto MN..... comment policy style.

I fucking love and miss you guys... even in Cali I care. ;)


comment #29, posted by B.A.C. at 05/17/2008 11:43am Reply
Hey Sarah! I believe you refer to vicepluslice which resulted in a comment policy here (as relaxed as our policy is though....). How are things on the west coast? Hope your having fun, tell Josh we said Hello!
I am the eggman
comment #30, posted by d0ze at 05/19/2008 11:08am Reply
this blog is all kinds of win. If youre so honest, you should do a writeup as to how to land a threesome every night thurs-sun. here in miami....


i'm told fun happens at the flamingo ; )

*steve madden.... LOL

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