MiamiNights - Miami Night Clubs, Nightlife

Hi guys. I'm in lala land as a result of the pleasing medications delivered to me after a root canal. It was overall a pleasant experience except the bill. Anyway I forgot how to make up sentences so forgive me for this post.

This weekend is eXXXotica, which is basically the fuckin-n-suckin equivalent of the boat show. That means Miami is crawling in more dirty pornwhores than ever before.

It starts tonight with Tera Patrick at Vice, the upstairs of Cameo. The party is presented by Ciroc and features DJ Irie and Louis Dee.

It continues tomorrow at Glass. We're giving away a free bottle for the official eXXXotica Afterparty at Glass, featuring Jesse Jane and Gina Lynn. They'll be prancing around like ponies and balancing things on their heads and being immoral.

Load up on antibiotics, antique full-body steel diving suits, and preapproved credit cards: it's porn time in Miami.

I feel bad for all the people who are going to Orlando to see Justice. Not just because Orlando is the real-life version of that movie The Hills Have Eyes. No, I feel bad because they'll be missing Tommie Sunshine at Vice. It's ok, we can plan our mockery and heap scorn upon them together, because I'm giving away a free bottle for one lucky winner and his band of mutants. Doors open at 10 because it's Spring Break.

Click here to sign up

Ladies and gentlemen, this years Winter Music Conference is gonna be sick. And the above mentioned clubs are killing by bringing you lineups listed in the below image. Also don't forget you can buy "Club Space WMC VIP Early Bird Prices" until March 1st, 2008. You can see all the details on VIP prices by clicking the "read more" link at the bottom of this post.

Click here to read full article..

The problem: Men: I know how it is. You really want to get your pretty precious chonga some special little trinket to add to her charm anklet, but International Mall closes at like 10 p.m. and you didn't wake up until like 7 p.m. Then you have to spend some time getting the most out of your TrannyTrick.com membership. So she's all pissed, she won't STFU: "You told me you loved me," "What about our son," etc. You need to do something to shut her up, and fast. Murder isn't an option: you aren't detail oriented enough to get away with it. The only other option: taking her out to party.

The solution: We're giving away a free bottle tonight at Vice, and we want you to have it. You get free comp admission for four of your closest friends (or family members if you party with grandpa). We're announcing the winner at 6 p.m., so click here to signup now!

Set leads the pack for the most nominations by any Miami venue for this year's 2008 Club World Award to be held Wednesday, March 26 at -- um, well Set during Winter Music Conference. The Opium Group's luxury lounge is nominate for Best Lounge, Best New Venue, Best Sound System, Best Video System, Best Interior Design and Best Resident VJ. Cameo also scored multiple nominations for Best Lighting System, Best Interior Design, Best Renovation and Best One-Off. Mansion, Pawn Shop, Space, Karu & Y, Nikki Beach and Prive also scored nominations.

Full list of nominees after the jump. 

Click here to read full article..

Cameo is having their big New Years Eve explosion extravaganza Sunday night. If you don't feel like schlepping out to the beach and attempting to survive the New Years Eve money pit, this is your alternative. We're giving one lucky winner (and four of their closest friends) a free bottle because we didn't get anyone anything for Christmas so this is our lame attempt at making up for it. SMAC has brought us a lot of fun during 2007, and unless Satan rips a gash in the surface of the earth and jumps out of the resulting firey chasm, this will be fun as well.

Click here to enter the bottle contest

Click here for full flyer

I don't listen to any artists from the past. I delete all mp3s once they reach 14 days of age. I often purchase all the old vinyl at thrift stores and burn it in a heap in my back yard, huffing the fumes and electrocuting my groin with parts from an old reel-to-reel tape recorder.

However, if you like to reflect on old jamz from back in the day, you will be delighted to know that Slick Rick and Biz Markee are at Cameo tonight. Also, America's Top Model Caridee English will likely be there. Check it.

Click here for full gallery!

That was intense. Where am I?

Click for full gallery

This Wednesday Miami Nights along with SMAC Entertainment will be playing host to the Cameo/Vice Wild Turkey Thanksgiving Party and SMAC's 10 year anniversary with DJ's Ztrip and Shawn Rudnick. Win a FREE bottle this Wednesday @ Vice courtesy of us and even if you don't win a bottle the first 50 people to sign up will get guest list love. Join your favorite drunk bloggers and get harassed incessantly for naked pictures!!!

CLICK HERE TO WIN A FREE BOTTLE